Saturday, September 13, 2008
Change
Its funny life's changes...there are the little day to day changes of new apt, new clothes, new friends, new procedures at work etc.. then there are those monumental changes like leaving home for college, graduation, moving cross country for your 1st job, moving cross country again for your 2nd job......MARRIAGE. I don't think you can ever prepare yourself enough for any sort of change. I compare change to hurling myself off of a cliff. It comes down to well am I gonna do it or am I not!! There have been some cliff moments that I have walked away from knowing...well...yeah, not this time...and there are others that the leap was o so enticing and I did the jump but did crash into the trees and rocks along the way. Left with some bumps and bruises and the feeling like; well that was a bumpy ride....maybe I should put a little more thought into that next time...hahaha...all in all. Life is a bumpy journey full of lots of risks, bumps, bruises, tears, joys, and sorrows. And I have to say and I know this will sound sappy but one of the things I saw in Chris was I knew in the core of my being that this is someone I can do life with and want to do life's journey with and want to learn life with. awwwww Yeah I know I'm puking. :) Our lives just seemed to flow together and getting married and starting our life just flowed so naturally that when I do sit back and look at it ...I'm shocked. Its hard to explain but it just goes....and now I'm going through the process of changing my name, my life, my status, all my credit cards. I have a new last name! I'm still shocked every time I have to give it to someone...not use to this. I'm under a whole new name! And not use to using the word husband...its so weird to me. So I just call him Chris...and I think through all the terms...husband, partner, significant other....hmmm wow do I really have a husband!! I still feel like a single girl at times. All in all I'm glad I do have a God that is with me all along the way...through every cliff moment, every jump, every crash, and every flight :) He is faithful and with me all along the way.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
My Biblical sense of Marriage
To get at the best in anything, you need facts. I consider facts as the father of success. Every success in marriage is fathered by facts, not luck. Quite a number of people have very peaceful and harmonious homes. Some are not even Christians, but they have unconsciously engaged the vital law of success in marriage the law of sense. Many have put the blame for their troubled homes at the door of the devil. But I believe the devil is not to be blamed for some of the problems we find in homes today. Some of them are self-caused. I do not intend that for my home!The Bible says by wisdom is a house built and by understanding it is established (Prov. 24:3-4). Wisdom has a way of establishing peace and serenity in the home. But it places a responsibility on me. Men with successful homes have accepted the responsibility of loving their wives, and the wives have also accepted the responsibility of submitting to their husbands. The Bible sense for getting into marriage or for enjoying a successful home is accepting my responsibility in designing or determining our destiny. I believe that shortage of sense is the reason for problems in the home. Marriage is neither a myth nor magic. It is a relationship consciously entered into. You can't wake up one morning and find somebody by your side. That happened only once in the garden of Eden, never to happen again. Marriage is a good thing established by God, for the benefit of man. But to enjoy the benefits, it must be entered into as God intended it to be. Starting right is the solid foundation for success in marriage. The Bible says in Psalm 11:3: If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do? Success in marriage starts even before a couple enters into marriage. A sure foundation sets the pace for a successful home.
1. Finding The Person "How do I get into marriage?" is the first question you must ask. I ask myself this critical question before I propose to Joanna. The answer is in Proverbs 18:22: Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord. "Whoso findeth..." not, "Whoso prayeth or fasteth", or "Whoso his father giveth a wife..." Finding a wife is a conscious act. It doesn't happen in a sleep or dream. You enter into marriage with your senses alive. You consciously engage yourself in a finding process, by opening your mind and eyes to locate who you can spend your lifetime with which I found in Joanna Moody. The finding process is not spiritual, but a practical one. You open your eyes wide to find a partner. After finding, you evaluate what you have found, if it is what you really want or not. Joanna and I believe in service to humanity by affecting lives of people we come across our part and leaving a mark in this world. As a believer, there are two basic criteria for determining who to marry. Must Be A Believer No matter the counsel, dream, or vision, there is no meeting point between a Christian and a sinner. The Abrahamic covenant demands that I marry among my kinsmen only. I'm not permitted to marry strangers. In simple language, the unbeliever is out of the question for me as a believer, no matter how i feel about it or how much i would have loved to.The Bible is clear on this. Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: forwhat fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? For ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. 2 Corinthians 6:14-16 Considering an unbeliever for marriage is completely out of the question, no matter how well you i'm convinced that someday she will be saved. If i go on in a relationship with an unbeliever, it is easier for me to backslide than for an unbeliver to saved. This is because it is easier to be pulled down from a height than to be pulled up from a well or valley. It is Scripturally unsafe for me to be unequally yoked with unbelievers. No matter what possession the unbeliever has, she is out of the way. Even if she is the most beautiful lady on earth, she is out of the way. Even if i claim she looks beautiful, there are many beautiful devils. A beautiful woman does not mean a saved woman. You may say, "In fact, since I knew her or him, they have never hurt a fly." You will be the first fly sheor him will hurt! You don't need to pray or think about considering an unbeliever as a marriage partner. God gave us brains so we can let Him rest. God doesn't listen to prayers that negate His Word. Your friends and church members may hear your groaning in prayer, but God won't, if it contradicts His Word.
The second criterion for making choice on who to marry is agreement. The Bible says: Can two walk together, except they be agreed? Amos 3:3 And I ask myrself, "Do we agree? Are we working towards a common goal?" our desire is towards a successful home, I don't need prayer to be able to answer them. After these two criteria have been met, we make our choice of a marriage partner. Don't be afraid to make your choice, because even God respects your choice (Deut. 30:19). To marry someone you don't like makes you a fool.
After reaching my decision I went ahead to communicate to her of my choice, my desire to marry her. I give her a chance to decide whether she wants to marry me or not. Because I understand that agreement for marriage should be by choice, not under any religious influence. God is not the author of confusion. Choice must be by mutual agreement, not by spiritual harassment. When a lady says "No" to your proposal, go and look elsewhere for a wife. She has a right to choose who she wants to marry, so do not blackmail or stampede her into marrying me by telling her God said she is my wife. I thank God she said yes J Everyone has a right to decide who he or she wants to marry. Marriage is by choice, not by force. Courtship is a fact-finding period. Marriage without courtship naturally ends in crisis, because there was no opportunity to get to know each other and prove whether the choice made was wise or not. Although ours wasn’t that long but, we knew each other and our calling. Courtship for is only a period of proving our compatibility. Courtship is a covenant culture for a successful marriage. It gives us the opportunity to change our mind in the process.
Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. The covenant demands that I protect the relationship from defilement. The honour of marriage is an undefiled bed. For those who are ignorant of this, the former things God has overlooked. Those who know it pay heavily for disobeyingevery beautiful thing has a price tag. So I will protect my relationship, and i will enjoy dignity. ...For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Matthew 19:5 This is the foundation. For my home to be successful, we both have leave our parents to cleave to each other. A boy can't leave home; only men can. Neither can a girl leave home; girls live at home. Immaturity is the reason why many couples are in a house, but are not at home. They are married to their spouses quite alright, but they are at home with their parents. We are absolutely responsible for our choice, we will not fail! Our home shall be the haven God created it to be, in Jesus' name!
In His presence is fullness of joy and pleasures forever, not pressures. - Psalm 16:11
This is what i know and intend to abide by and live with myn sweetheart!
CHRIS.
1. Finding The Person "How do I get into marriage?" is the first question you must ask. I ask myself this critical question before I propose to Joanna. The answer is in Proverbs 18:22: Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord. "Whoso findeth..." not, "Whoso prayeth or fasteth", or "Whoso his father giveth a wife..." Finding a wife is a conscious act. It doesn't happen in a sleep or dream. You enter into marriage with your senses alive. You consciously engage yourself in a finding process, by opening your mind and eyes to locate who you can spend your lifetime with which I found in Joanna Moody. The finding process is not spiritual, but a practical one. You open your eyes wide to find a partner. After finding, you evaluate what you have found, if it is what you really want or not. Joanna and I believe in service to humanity by affecting lives of people we come across our part and leaving a mark in this world. As a believer, there are two basic criteria for determining who to marry. Must Be A Believer No matter the counsel, dream, or vision, there is no meeting point between a Christian and a sinner. The Abrahamic covenant demands that I marry among my kinsmen only. I'm not permitted to marry strangers. In simple language, the unbeliever is out of the question for me as a believer, no matter how i feel about it or how much i would have loved to.The Bible is clear on this. Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: forwhat fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? For ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. 2 Corinthians 6:14-16 Considering an unbeliever for marriage is completely out of the question, no matter how well you i'm convinced that someday she will be saved. If i go on in a relationship with an unbeliever, it is easier for me to backslide than for an unbeliver to saved. This is because it is easier to be pulled down from a height than to be pulled up from a well or valley. It is Scripturally unsafe for me to be unequally yoked with unbelievers. No matter what possession the unbeliever has, she is out of the way. Even if she is the most beautiful lady on earth, she is out of the way. Even if i claim she looks beautiful, there are many beautiful devils. A beautiful woman does not mean a saved woman. You may say, "In fact, since I knew her or him, they have never hurt a fly." You will be the first fly sheor him will hurt! You don't need to pray or think about considering an unbeliever as a marriage partner. God gave us brains so we can let Him rest. God doesn't listen to prayers that negate His Word. Your friends and church members may hear your groaning in prayer, but God won't, if it contradicts His Word.
The second criterion for making choice on who to marry is agreement. The Bible says: Can two walk together, except they be agreed? Amos 3:3 And I ask myrself, "Do we agree? Are we working towards a common goal?" our desire is towards a successful home, I don't need prayer to be able to answer them. After these two criteria have been met, we make our choice of a marriage partner. Don't be afraid to make your choice, because even God respects your choice (Deut. 30:19). To marry someone you don't like makes you a fool.
After reaching my decision I went ahead to communicate to her of my choice, my desire to marry her. I give her a chance to decide whether she wants to marry me or not. Because I understand that agreement for marriage should be by choice, not under any religious influence. God is not the author of confusion. Choice must be by mutual agreement, not by spiritual harassment. When a lady says "No" to your proposal, go and look elsewhere for a wife. She has a right to choose who she wants to marry, so do not blackmail or stampede her into marrying me by telling her God said she is my wife. I thank God she said yes J Everyone has a right to decide who he or she wants to marry. Marriage is by choice, not by force. Courtship is a fact-finding period. Marriage without courtship naturally ends in crisis, because there was no opportunity to get to know each other and prove whether the choice made was wise or not. Although ours wasn’t that long but, we knew each other and our calling. Courtship for is only a period of proving our compatibility. Courtship is a covenant culture for a successful marriage. It gives us the opportunity to change our mind in the process.
Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. The covenant demands that I protect the relationship from defilement. The honour of marriage is an undefiled bed. For those who are ignorant of this, the former things God has overlooked. Those who know it pay heavily for disobeyingevery beautiful thing has a price tag. So I will protect my relationship, and i will enjoy dignity. ...For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Matthew 19:5 This is the foundation. For my home to be successful, we both have leave our parents to cleave to each other. A boy can't leave home; only men can. Neither can a girl leave home; girls live at home. Immaturity is the reason why many couples are in a house, but are not at home. They are married to their spouses quite alright, but they are at home with their parents. We are absolutely responsible for our choice, we will not fail! Our home shall be the haven God created it to be, in Jesus' name!
In His presence is fullness of joy and pleasures forever, not pressures. - Psalm 16:11
This is what i know and intend to abide by and live with myn sweetheart!
CHRIS.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)